Screw em, Angus!

Did anyone else watch that awesomely fantastic movie about the super fat kid in high school with the lisp? Angus. One of the best movies ever... and no one has seen it.

"I'm a fat kid, of course I know what bulimia is. I tried it once, but when I stuck my finger down my throat, I was still hungry and almost ate my arm." - Angus

"Screw em, Angus!" - Angus' grandpa

You think you know what eating disorders are, don't you? Already skinny girls, obsessed with getting skinnier. They eat enough to feed a small country and then barf it all up or they just stop eating entirely. Their hair falls out, they lose muscle mass, they become nothing but skin and bones and still aren't thin enough.

But what about the one where food is the obsession you can't stop putting in your mouth? I do well for a while, but there's no KrispyKreme patch to wean me off of the food addiction. It's all or nothing. Cold turkey (with a side of cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes, and green bean casserole, plzkthx?).

I was doing well for a while. My bubble is a happy place. When I live alone, stay in my apartment as much as possible, and block out the rest of the world with deafening pop-punk from my headphones when I want to walk anywhere, life is good.

The moment I open myself up to outside influences - social situations, opinions-stares-glares-whispers-snickers from the 'diverse and accepting society' in which I have chosen to live (*gag* man, almost swallowed my tongue on that one), any restaurant outing - things tend to fall apart.

In the past two weeks, I've experienced the following:

- HS students exlclaiming the equivalent of "Thassa huge bitch!" in Japanese.

- HS students taking photos of me on their cell phones... in order to do god knows what with them later.

- Elementary kids running to catch up to their mates to have them turn around and check out the fattie and snickering.

- Students in my classroom guesstimating the width of my ass by holding their arms as far apart as possible and having a good chuckle about it.


And then? A lapse into a depression so deep that only ice cream and Kit-Kats could possibly repair it. Or so my brain thinks.

And so, a thank you to the people of the world for upholding at least one universal truth - kids are assholes.

I'm allowing myself this one last day to continue wallowing in my own misery, Jabba-esque in all my sluggish finery (without the slave girls on chains), and then we'll see where we are tomorrow.

Don't wait until tomorrow, just start now!

Don't worry about what other people think! The only thing that matters is how you feel!!

If ____________ can do it, so can you!

If you've ever uttered any of those phrases to anyone, you've never been where I am right now. So don't even try it.