Does This Make Me Look Stupid?

This is going to be short, not so sweet, but right to the damn point.

I absolutely hate... hate... seeing fat people (ok, girls) constantly worrying themselves with phrases like "Does this make me look fat?"

No, no IT does not make you look fat. FAT makes us look fat. I look fat every.single.day. There are ways to make illusions of being slimmer (waist nipped tops in dark colors, wearing dark colors in general, etc) and there are ways to make the illusion of yes, being fatter... (plaids and paisleys and don't get me started on the all-the-same-couch-print-from-the-70's skirt and top sets that Lane Bryant likes to sell). But let's face it... we're fat.

Maybe what you mean to say is, "Does this haircut make me look fatter?" "Do these jeans make my ass appear even bigger than it usually is?" There are some clothes that, when you put them on, it's a side-mirror in reverse. CAUTION: Objects in these pants may appear larger than they actually are.

I'm fat. I know I'm fat. I live in the land of the svelte and my brain and eyes have been re-trained as to what I think is fat or thin. I will never achieve this new definition of thin. I'm ok with that. Just because I have a definition of thin, that doesn't mean it's what I'm trying to accomplish.

And the only way to be fat and NOT want to drown yourself in a vat of caramel on a weekly (if not daily) basis, is to own it.

Fess up.

Take a photo of yourself in a swimsuit.

On second thought, don't do that. I did and my thighs haven't seen daylight in almost five years.